My kind of Perfect

I used to know it all about parenting. Then I had a kid.

As a first time mom, I tend to get a lot of parenting advice. Sometimes I've asked for it, but lots of times it's unsolicited.

Some of the well meaning advice comes from other mothers who only see things from their own rocking chair. They assume their own trials, successes, and failures will be exactly the same as mine, without considering that our family is different from theirs. My child is not the same as theirs. I have a different personality than they do. I get frustrated with their assumption that their way is the fix all solution.

Other moms seem to have a superiority complex and feel the need to critique. I often wonder how these parents find the time and knowledge to solve every problem, rise to avert any crisis, never lose their cool, always look put together in public, snap their kid into submission with a mere frowny nod, provide a daily cornucopia of educational experiences, have a wealth of knowledge in child development and all things medical, or where they gather that endless energy and organizational skills that it takes to be that perfect parent while not wearing spit on their shirt. Even June Cleaver threw up her hands in exasperation at the Beaver from time to time.

Then there's the media. It seems like every other day there's a new study that says this is harmful, and a contradictory study that says it's fine. This study says to do this. That study says to do that. Seriously, it's overwhelming. How can you not feel like a failure when half the products you use or the choices you make are deemed harmful or bad for development in one study or another?

Whether it's from here or there, there's no lack of information telling me how I can be better, more efficient, more perfect. It makes it hard not to doubt yourself. “Wasn't I doing okay? I try really hard.” As a working mom I have a lot of pressure already. I have to simultaneously perform well at my job and be a good wife while managing the household duties, and raising our child. There's enough of a challenge to juggle life in the fast lane without having to feel the need to be perfect in the eyes of others too.

In order to maintain some sense of sanity, I try to remind myself is that "perfect" is a relative term. What's perfect to me is not going to be perfect for the next person, and I don't need to live up to their definition of perfect. Only my own. If I try to live up to their perfect, then I'm just going to feel like a failure time after time.

For me to be the best mom possible, I feel like it's my job to develop my own parenting philosophy based on the needs of my family and learn to be flexible as those needs change. I have the privilege of knowing my child better than anyone else, which gives me a pretty good edge in deciding what philosophy will work for her. What works for a lot of people, may not work for us and that's okay. I hope you won't judge me for loving my child and parenting to her unique needs. If I do the best that I can, with the resources available in any given situation while keeping my child's best interest in mind, then in my book I have achieved perfection. ...or at least my kind of perfect.





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My bet is on Super Chick

Guess what we did this weekend!

We went to the Ostrich and Camel Races at the Horse Track. No I'm not joking. The track was running exhibition races between the horse races. It was extremely entertaining. The camels run just like horses do and amazingly fast. The ostriches are even funnier. They kind of bob and weave their heads as they pick up those long legs and book it toward the finish line. They had exercise jockeys riding them and most of the jockeys fell off into the very muddy track (I hope that was mud) before the end of the race. It was definitely worth a good laugh.

On Saturday we took Pickle to the Drive In Movie. We saw the Dark Knight. Great movie! Before leaving home we packed up the diaper bag, some sandwiches, pasta salad, snickers salad, and drinks. Then we topped off the gas tank and set off for the movies right around bed time for Katen. She fell asleep on the trip there, so she got a good 30 minute nap in before waking while Mom and Dad ate dinner.

It's amazing what a cat nap will do for that kid. She was bright eyed and bushy tailed so we played in the back seat for a while and ate some yogurt bites while Mom and Dad finished their dinner. Soon there was a tap tap tap on my window. It was the manager asking us to either move our vehicle or park straighter. We'd parked right next to a very large truck who was also a little catty corner so we'd just matched his angle. I got out and straightened out the vehicle just to have a scrawny little twit of of a kid come tell us that we had to move. Now we'd been there for quite a while and the parking lot was getting pretty full. Daddy told the twit to go get the manager. He did and yep, we still ended up moving. Apparently some bitty behind us in her Caddy couldn't see and was raising a stink. We went to the spot they told us to but the concession stand was in the way so we moved again. Third time was a charm. I guess. It wasn't an ideal spot but it was okay. A man from the truck previously next to us came walking up and asked what was going on. He thought it was just ridiculous too. C'est la vie.

By that time Katen started getting antsy so I took her out of her seat and bounced around outside the car. Daddy went for some popcorn and it began to get dark. Ummm really dark. And cooler. Then I saw people getting into their cars and turning them around. (Most people in SUV's watch from the hatch.) I looked behind me and "Holy Thunderclouds Batman!" (pun intended.)

Soon it began to rain and thunder and lightning. About the same time the movie started. We simply turned on the air conditioner and the wipers and had a decent time watching the movie until the field across from the drive in got hit by lightning and all power went out. They must have had a generator though because while the street lights, etc stayed off, the movie came back on after a minute or so.

Katen spent the first half of the movie rough housing and moving back and forth between mommy and daddy. Between the sound of the movie playing, the thunder, and the amazing lightning show you couldn't blame her for being a little over stimulated. Around 10pm she finally settled down to sleep in Mom's arms though. By the time the movie was over the rain had lightened up and it was a decent drive home. We didn't stay for the second movie and got home around midnight. It was a short night for Mommy but we had fun!

Going to the drive in is the best of both worlds. You get to watch a movie and you don't have to find a sitter.


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Football, Sign Language, and Raspberries

Sorry, no snazzy title today. After Katen successfully slept all night for two nights straight, she returned to her old self last night. I'll remember those two restful nights fondly.

Anyway...

On Wednesday we watched Daddy play in his last regular season flag football game. Of course they won. They're that good. (for 30-something men.) Our friend Amy, who is a whiz with the camera, was shooting pictures of the game, so I had a little fun editing some. (above) She also snapped a few of Katen. This one melts my heart...

We really look forward to watching Daddy play and visiting with the other wives and kids. It's a nice mid-week break and the weather has been great so far.

Last night we had our "Singing Together" class again. Katen enjoyed it a little more this time and spent a good portion of the class sitting on the floor blowing raspberries REALLY loudly, drooling like a St.Bernard. I don't know how many people have asked, "Is she teething?" Who knows. We keep thinking so, but there's still no signs on those adorable gummy smiles.

Katen's friends Maya, Ella, and Jacob seem to be getting more out of the class than we are but they're older too. They shake their maracas and clap their hands. We... well we like to eat the maracas. I'm sure there's some educational value in that too though, right?

Honestly, I think Katen just knows that the songs are dorky. She's smart that way. And it's true. The songs are totally dorky. And boring. And incredibly educational. Zzzz snooze. We're supposed to listen to the recorded CD every day in the car. Frankly it makes me miss Baby Mozart. I'm a horrible influence. How about we compromise with some U2 Lullaby's instead, Katen? (now you're talkin')

Speaking of education, sign language is going okay. Katen sort of knows milk and will do it for me when she's not tired. Singing more is a little more interpretive. You have to use your imagination a little. I've decided that maybe just this once I'll allow Katen to watch a video. I've downloaded some episodes of a show called Signing Time and My Baby Can Talk on my laptop, and I think I'll let her watch it. There's also a little song using the words More, Milk, and Please that I want her to see. She loves music and I think it will give her another avenue for learning the signs. I'll let you know how it goes.

...and one more picture. I tried to do a photo shoot at home and thought none of the pictures really came out well. Then I looked back and saw this one.

She. Cracks. Me. Up. Thhhhht!

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Local Olympic Talent

Adapted from our local newspaper and WHO

Local Olympic qualifiers Shawn Johnson and Lolo Jones will be given an Olympic sendoff today. Jones qualified for the Olympic team by winning the 100-meter hurdles at the U.S. Olympic Trials in Eugene, Ore. and Shawn Johnson won the U.S. Olympic Trials all-around championship in Philadelphia.

You may have read that Shawn's gym was under water at one point during the floods not long ago. Many people came to their assistance so that she was able to resume practice.
The sendoff, featuring a national anthem rendition by Simon Estes, will be open to the public.

We'll be sure to watch for them on TV. Both are expected to bring home a medal.

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You haven't lived until you've had spit-up between your toes

Katen was banned from daycare today. Looking back, I'm SO glad.

Yesterday she had three blowouts. Daycare rules say she has to be out for 24 hours after the last blowout so the kiddo and mommy had a fun day.

I really couldn't have asked for a better behaved little girl. She drank her bottles without rubber necking (she's a curious kid with better things to do than eat) and she napped when she was supposed to nap. We ran some errands in the morning. Got some water and formula. Then we picked up some bubbles.

How fun! Katen had a good time with the bubbles. The perplexed faces she made when they popped and floated away were so cute! Daddy had the camera with him at the golf tournament today or I would have snapped away. She really enjoys being outside and it wasn't as sweltering in the shade. I think the temp for today hovered around 90 degrees and it's pretty humid. Hopefully we weren't out long enough for her allergies to flare up. We'll do a dose of Zyrtec before bed tonight.

We had a good time inside too. Katen was pretty relaxed today and let me get a tiny bit of cleaning done while she played in her jumperoo and practiced trying to crawl when she was put down by her play gym. From time to time, I'd give her a few ounces of pedialyte. She's still a little poo machine so between that and the heat I wanted to keep her hydrated. Well sometimes she likes it a lot and drinks too much for her tummy to hold. This was one of those times and when I sat her up to burp, she spewed down my leg and between my toes. Now try to hold a squirmy baby and wipe spit from between your toes. It "ain't" easy folks. When I used to dream of motherhood, these were not the moments I imagined, but I love it anyway. You just have to laugh and I'm telling you... You haven't lived until you've had spit up between your toes. I hear milk is good for the skin, so I'll call it "a pedicure."

Shortly after cleaning my toes off she got my shirt too. This isn't an uncommon occurrence. It happens all the time so I wiped myself down and went on with my business. Honestly if I changed every time she puked on my I'd go through 5,6,7 shirts a day maybe. Plus I wasn't going anywhere. ....except an hour later when I remembered I needed to pick up a new shower handle. (Yeah, super mom here keeps pulling it clean off the wall. This is number 3.) I packed a quick bag of diapees, wipes, and my wallet and headed out with Katen. The kiddo got a lot of attention in the store. People were staring at her cuteness and one lady even pointed at her. I'm thinking Yes, thank you, I know she's cute. It's all thanks to her Daddy. The reality hits and I realize I am sporting a very fashionable (dried) puke stripe down my shirt. They are making fun of me. Sexy. Nobody can say I'm not a hands on mom. I have a puke badge to prove it!

The rest of the day was just as great as the morning. We ate some pureed organic apples (which are delish!), had a fun bath, and Katen got to wear her first pair of big girl PJ's. Did you know that once they hit 6 mos sizes, pretty much anything up to 2T actually fits? Her PJ's are size 18mos. They fit fine thanks to "diaper butt." :) awww... my little girl is growing up.

She's laying peacefully in her crib now. We read a few books and snuggled with our lovey for a while before nodding off for the night. Aren't they precious when they sleep? Such innocence.

Daddy came home from golfing so I took the opportunity to install my new shower handle and, well, take a shower. Except... I broke the handle again. Yes. I'm serious.
I do things like that all the time. I'm perfectly imperfect, and I'll write about that another time. Right now, I'm going to take advantage of an early bedtime and say goodnight. Sweet dreams...zzzzz




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